I don’t even remember what started it now.

We were just a few minutes into a conversation recently before Anthony and I found ourselves in a tiff that left me emotionally crinkled and somewhat frustrated.

I walked out of the room and prayed these exact words, “God, help me love an imperfect man!”

The vehement statement had barely escaped my lips before the Holy Spirit tapped me on the shoulder and handed me a mirror.

As crinkled as I was, I couldn’t help but chuckle.

With more than two decades of marriage under our belt now, Anthony and I don’t tend to have as many verbal jousting matches as we did when we were newly married.

However, we’re both still broken people in need of God’s forgiveness, grace, and mercy on a daily basis. We’re not immune to misunderstandings, hurt feelings, or selfish preferences.

We still have a need for the Gospel to be actively working in our marriage because we’re both still learning to look and be more like Jesus every day.

Which means there are still hard moments and hard days.

Paul bluntly addressed those choosing to marry in I Corinthians 7 by saying, “…such people will have trouble in this life…” (vs. 28 CSV)

Would we grow in Christ, though, if that wasn’t the case?

True growth, healthy growth requires adversity. Challenge. Opposition.

In marriage and in life.

The goal, however, is to always let the adversity drive us closer to Jesus. Because it’s there, when we run to Him over and over and over again, that we get to know Him better and better.

We also begin to see ourselves – our sin, brokenness, flaws, failures, and imperfections – clearer and clearer, which is enormously helpful! Because then we can continuously lay them at Jesus’s feet, pick up our cross, die (again) to ourselves, and keep following Him.

It’s a foundational truth to living the abundant life God has given to us so freely.

Jesus said, “If anyone wants to follow after me, let him deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me.” (Matthew 16:24 CSV)

Makes me grateful for an imperfect marriage that points me to a perfect Savior every day!

Until next time, Grace and Glory!